Tuesday, May 15, 2012

A Broken Will

So, I heard that song again. You know the one.

"Brokenness, brokenness, that's what I long for. Brokenness is what I need." 

As a woman of faith, admittedly, a word of faith woman, I believe that when Jesus said that He came to heal the brokenhearted, He meant what He said. When He said that He would make me whole, He meant it. When the Bible speaks of shalom, it speaks of nothing missing, nothing broken. I believe that includes me. If God said it, that settles it. That's why I don't sing along with that verse in that song. At least until I heard it again. At least until I really heard that song. 

Maybe I'm just a Johnny-come-lately, and maybe you already had this one figured out, but won't you humor this late-bloomer for a minute?

Jesus was the most put-together Man to ever walk planet Earth. Gentle, yes. Humble in heart, yes. Broken, absolutely not! He knew Who He was. He knew His purpose. He knew what belonged to Him in God. He never complained that He was born in a stable. He never wailed about His poor upbringing in Nazareth. He never felt sorry for Himself, misunderstood, or panicky when people were seeking His very life.

One dark night in an olive grove, Jesus Christ, the Son of God, faced the meaning of brokenness. On His face, sweating blood, He cried out, "Take this cup from me. Nevertheless, not what I will, but what you will. Not my will, but thine be done." And that, dear friend, is true brokenness.

Brokenness is not feeling sorry for myself. It is not wallowing in the events of the past that have hurt me. It is not wearing my "wounds" on my sleeve, looking for sympathy from people when I refuse to let Christ heal those wounds, just like He promised. I can be made whole and be completely restored by the Restorer of Broken Walls, and still suffer a time of brokenness.

Not a broken life. Not a broken psyche. Not a broken heart.

A broken will.

When life deals blow after blow, punching the lights out of what I thought my life would be, I can say, "Not my will, but thine be done."

When Satan is allowed to sift me like wheat, I can stand tall in the power of the Holy Spirit, and say, "Have your will, my God. Not my will, but thine be done."

When I'm tired, and worn out, and think that I can't give one more ounce of myself, I can own the Word that says, "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me."

Somehow, supernaturally, I will be able to give and love and nurture and care for others, for one more day. Not in my power, but in His. Not my will, but His be done.

We talk some good talk when we say that we want the Lord's will done in our lives. But that divine will won't ever be accomplished until our own human wills are broken. That is true brokenness.

True brokenness stands up in the middle of the violent wind and the raging storm, it's hair blowing in the hurricane that is life, and screams, "Jesus! I wouldn't do this for anyone else but you!!!!!"

"Not my will...but thine be done."

Brokenness, brokenness, is what I long for. Brokenness is what I need.




 

43 comments:

  1. Such a sweet and honest post. I admire you for being able to post so openly about your religion. It reminds me of a scripture where Christ says that the most important thing needed in order to repent is a broken heart and a contrite spirit- to be broken essentially. A beautiful take on this.

    new follower :)
    bonnie
    bonnielouisa.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. You have given me some excellent thoughts to consider. I refused to sing that song too. Perhaps us Word of Faith people are narrow minded in some ways!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you for sharing you heart Donna :D

    ReplyDelete
  4. Very thought provoking post.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Love this, Donna. :) I think I need to paste those words, "Not my will...but thine be done" on my refrigerator and bathroom mirror so I see them every single day.

    Hugs,
    ~Rosann

    ReplyDelete
  6. It was when I finally broke to self that I felt free. In that moment, when I finally surrendered my will and submitted to the Lord, THAT is when I was healed. It was in my brokenness that I became whole...praise God! Great post -- it was such an encouragement to me this morning! Blessings, Joan

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am reading post after post about being broken today. Clearly God is moving and the Spirit is convicting so many sweet writers that He is the great Restorer. The Healer. And I love what you say about how we hold back, we can give God control of the 90%, but reserve the final 10% for our will to be done.
    Beautiful post. Glad to be here from Emily's place today. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. wow i def like your definition of brokeness...and it is def not easy to surrender truly to the will of god knowing that his answers are def often different from the way we think they should be...so yes i will echo as well for this kind of brokeness...smiles.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I love the honesty here. God continues to teach me to say to Him, "Not my will but thine be done."

    Glad I found you through WFW. I am a new follower. :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Good morning! I am visiting from GMG's Women in the Word Wednesday! Wonderful post :)

    http://lawyergirlruns86.blogspot.com/2012/05/women-in-word-wednesday.html

    ReplyDelete
  11. Simply beautiful. It takes a truly humble heart to long for brokenness.

    ReplyDelete
  12. You have me reviewing a problem with which I struggle...I'm glad to have the reminder of these words today :)

    ReplyDelete
  13. your honesty is refreshing, your words needed.

    janelle

    ReplyDelete
  14. A broken will. Yes, this is what I want. I remind myself daily, it's not about me. It's about thee. :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. this brokeness. yes. i need it too. i resist this urge to rely. to admit i cannot do it. thank you for these words. i always need these reminders.

    ReplyDelete
  16. They will be done in my life Lord. Amen. We are so blessed to have a Lord who cares above and beyond what we can imagine that we need in our life.

    Great devotion. Have a fabulous day :)

    ReplyDelete
  17. I think, I feel, I want...the relentless mantra of the unsurrendered soul. Oh my, I have such an altogether willful will! God help me to voluntarily surrender my will to Yours.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Interesting thoughts here. We absolutely need a broken will in order to accept his will. I have been touched by the amount of emotion Jesus felt leading up to his time in the garden. He dreaded the cross long before then. He suffered in emotional ways before then and relied on a relationship with his Father to carry through. We are now called to suffer with him. Does that mean we whine about it? No way! God is glorified in our weakness. He won't be glorified unless we are real, however, admitting to our trials and declaring his strength in us.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Amen. All we have to give is our will, why o why is it so hard? God bless you in your journey.

    ReplyDelete
  20. It's funny because I see so much of myself in my children sometimes. I say I want His will but find myself whining when I have to wait. He is so good to keep us even when we struggle to mean those precious words, "Thy will be done." Well said.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I agree, Donna. It's about allowing our will to be broken so that His will can be done in and through our lives.

    Blessings,
    Joan

    ReplyDelete
  22. What a beautiful post Donna. I havent always sought His Will but now I would have it no other way. So glad to see you today over at THANKFUL THURSDAY! :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Your post really spoke to me today. You are so right and I always need the reminder about accepting my journey without complaint. And, that He will give us the supernatural power to endure. This was really needed today. Thank you for your honesty and willingness to share.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Yes, it's the will He needs to deal with in us. He has shown me again and again that in the end He is good. For my brokenness will be the crack allowing the seed to root, grow and plant His joy...perfection and peace in, and beauty will be the outcome.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Good reminder, Donna. I've blogged on this topic, also. Choosing God's will over self can be tough but always rewarding. (Visiting from BLN blog hop.)

    ReplyDelete
  26. this perspective of Christ's offered submission is a good one. the phrase "broken will" is often (mis)used in child discipline, and it makes me heartsick. no person should break another's will. it should only be offered freely, to God who will never abuse and lovingly craft wholeness and beauty from broken places.

    i haven't heard that song in forever. thanks for helping me hear it with new ears.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Hi. Hopping over from the Weekend Blog walk.

    @_tubbytelly

    ReplyDelete
  28. Donna thankyou for linking up today with Caffeinated Randomness. All I can say is AMEN. I long to be broken by the One who can redeem and use that brokenness for something amazing.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I can totally relate to not singing along with this song (doesn't God want us whole? and healed? so why I am longing for not being healted) and then later...getting it...being broken for you...Jesus was broken for us...willing to submit to the Father's will...broken and poured out He was!! And so we can long to emulate Him in this, too.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Just dropping in to hear this message and let you know that Freedom Fridays is up and running. I would love it if you linked up again this week:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for sharing this at Freedom Fridays.

      Delete
  31. Visiting via FF. Thank you for sharing this honest post. It made me smile:)
    Have a Blessed weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Thank you for blessing us with your post! Visiting from the blog walk! http://chaseandmore.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hi Donna,
    Brokenness is truly something I desire, not just in some areas as it is today, but in all areas of my life. I need to be completely possessed by God. Thanks for sharing this post. God bless you!
    Following from the blog walk.
    http://www.ugochi-jolomi.com/

    ReplyDelete
  34. Oh, yes, Donna. This is true brokenness and something we all need, isn't it? I love thinking through what I'm singing at times, and like you, there are times I've hesitated to sing something.
    Bless you for adding your link to Bible Love Notes B&BB. I'm praying you have a great week!

    ReplyDelete
  35. new follower from the @home take 2 blog hop. I'd love to have you come check out my blog and follow me as well.

    brokenness is the beginning of beauty - i am the clay in the potters hands.

    like john the baptist - i must decrease so that He may increase.

    blessings to you Donna!
    janiene
    http://bishopsfamilysite.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  36. Blessings Donna, Your heartfelt, sincere poar is powerful testimony to a strong faith in Him. I am visiting from B&BB.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Dear Donna

    I really love your devotionals and this one spoke to my heart!

    Congratulations - you are one of this week's features at Inspire Me Monday at Create With Joy!

    I look forward to seeing more of your devotions and I hope you have a blessed week!

    Create With Joy
    http://create-with-joy.com

    ReplyDelete
  38. This is so true, Donna. Thank you for sharing this insight.
    Blessings,
    Charlotte

    ReplyDelete
  39. Love these thoughts on brokenness. Very thought provoking.
    Thanks for linking up with Lessons From Ivy, I hope you will again this Tuesday.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Thank you so much for sharing this with us at Natural Mother's “Seasonal Celebration Sunday.” Hope to see you again this Sunday / Monday!! Rebecca x

    ReplyDelete